The front door closed and so went the smell of cigarettes. Mom and step-dad going to work. The house was his now, and his three toddler sisters, whom he adored. He woke them and said, “Come out and play.” MTV was turned on and Bon Jovi or Guns and Roses were on, in all their glam rock glory. He sat down on the floor, in front of the TV. His eldest toddler sister, Lauren, came out and put her hand on his shoulder and said, “ Should I wake up Laurel and Kelly?”
“Nah, let them sleep.” and he turned and tickled Lauren with his hand he acted like his hand was a buzzing bee coming to get her. She squealed and bent over trying to cover her stomach. He attacked her side with his combined fingers. and she fell into his arms laughing. He fell onto his back and she laid on his stomach. Giggling. Best of friends. He was 14 taking care of three toddlers, had his hands full. Didn’t wish he could go out with friends, his friends were inside.
Mom asked him to vacuum, but not before he fed his sisters breakfast. Got the other two up, changed their diapers and into their high-chairs they went. While he got out bowls for cereal Lauren climbed onto a chair at the dining room table, like a big girl.
After breakfast he washed the dishes quickly, now he had three toddlers roaming about. He finished and returned to his spot on the floor, in front of the TV. Kelly and Laurel sat, thumb in mouth gazing into the mind mashing TV. Then he distracted them with toys.They, now walking were a group to keep a cautious eye on. Lauren took big sister role seriously. And showed them how to play with the toys presented to them. With them occupied he decided to get his chores done, vacuum and put a roast in the Crock Pot for dinner. All he did was listen to music all day, in one form or another, and watch his little crew. He loved them even though their alcoholic father had finally stopped trying to stomp him out. He was too big now and might strike back after all the years of cruel and unusual punishments that were more like torture. He never cried Child Abuse! At school, and he knew that is what he was experiencing, but the love for his Mother was strong and the threat of being separated from her killed that idea, instantly. He would not leave her side, guarding her, having conflicts with her being a teen-ager but never turning his back.
Little Lauren was his first opportunity to hold a new life in his arms. Protecting the soft spot on her head, supporting her skull in the crook of his arm. The birth of the twins meant a new apartment across from the high school. And a lot more work for Mom. But she had his help, always. Getting them dressed in the morning to go to the baby sitter. It was a delight not a chore.
Now, she is a grown woman with her own child. His first chance at being an Uncle. Being far from his niece, he wrote a diary for her. Everyday, first thing was his entry, wondering what her first word would be and when she could walk and what school was like. He admired his sister, now making a family, surrounding herself with love. The twins got married. Being as far as he was away from them all he did was the best he could do and prayed for their marriage, knowing the odds are against them. After Mom died and they moved with a family friend he knew but didn’t realize if she did but Lauren was the matriarch of the family. And he saw her as a strong one, battle tested helping her Mother walk down the last walk that she would take.
He knew it was hard on her, knowing he could’ve done it. But it wasn’t just her.The twins were in the house, too, and in their teens. Their father had died suddenly a few years earlier but this would hurt more than that. Their matriarch was leaving this Earth and going out fast. They kept her comfortable which was all they could really do. He was a cab ride away when she left. He’s sort of glad, wouldn’t want to see the vibrant young lady that he remembered as a young boy, the young lady he shared a bed with and sang, “It’s you and me against the world” with, be silenced eternally. No. Not that.
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